The airport kiss that started a thousand lines…

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/10/nyregion/10newark.html

So it seems things have been a little tense over the past few weeks. First with the dumbass trying to light his underpants on fire on Christmas and then the few occasions where NORAD deployed fighter jets because of unruly passengers. Now I’m guessing anything plane related right now is pretty much on edge and nothing to fuck around with.

So this past week this “romantic” Chinese guy decided to break the perimeter and sneak across to the secure side of the airport to meet up with his girlfriend for a quick kiss goodbye. And the ensuing shitstorm caused thousands of people to be delayed up to six hours at Newark International Airport. Flights delayed, people delayed, people rescreened, and lots of searching, all because of this 28 year old Rutgers University graduate student Haisong Jiang decided to get some last minute sugar from his sweetheart.

Now I understand this guy deserves a good amount of blame for sneaking across and causing the problems he did, but should he receive most of the blame is my question. Sen. Frank R. Lautenberg, of New Jersey, seems to think he should and said he is receiving a slight slap on the wrist considering his “offense”. That slap meaning getting charged with “defiant trespass” in municipal court. In fact the Senator wants him charged with a federal offense and have him made an example of so that other people would be discouraged to try the same stunt Jiang did.

Now I disagree with the Senator. The man made a bad judgment call by sneaking through to see his girlfriend. He did defiantly trespass and passed through when he was not supposed to. But are you going to make an example of a graduate student seeing off his girlfriend? I don’t think a terrorist that is bent on getting through the way Jiang did, is gonna care if he goes to municipal court or federal court. So it seems the Senator just cares about punishing regular people that decide to sneak through to the secure area.

How about placing the blame where its supposed to be. How about that TSA official that left his post when he was not supposed to or how he should have at least called for somebody to cover his spot when he needed to leave. The TSA spends so much time and money to become a pain in the ass to regular flyers by creating pain in the ass policies and enforcing them that they should spend some of that time and money on properly training themselves.  How about some security management training instead of making me get rid of my tube of toothpaste or bottle of water and instead of spending all that money on xray technology that can see people naked, you spend it on creating a system where you dont hassle the shit out of the flyers or intrude on the privacy of people’s mothers, daughters, sons, fathers, brothers and sisters. How about you spend that money on some fucking tapes for the video camera, instead of having cameras running but not recording.

From the article it seemed like somebody notified the TSA officials before something was done. I wonder what would have happened if there was no notice.  Since Jiang is not a terrorist but a romantic, would nobody have been delayed at all, would all that time and effort used to re screen everybody been avoided.

I certainly would think so.

Notes for TSA:

-Buy some tapes
-Do you job right

The ever growing list of shit customers of Chinese restaurants do to annoy me. PART 2

I wrote a post back in June titled

The ever growing list of shit customers of Chinese restaurants do to annoy me.

and here is Part 2… Annoyance with a Vengeance.

These three have got to be the biggest pet peeves I can possibly think of when working in a small Chinese takeout. Keep in mind this place is slightly more busy than a typical takeout, so pretty much every second is precious during our rush hour in order to keep things flowing smoothly. If anybody has ever visited Pat or Geno’s in Philadelphia for a cheesesteak, it’s kinda like that on certain days but more mayhem.

I know this was mentioned in Part 1 but it is so damn annoying that it needs to be brought back for part 2. This has got to be my #1 pet peeve because it happens so damn often. #1 is when customers call in and THEN try to figure out what they want to eat. Like seriously, every Americanized Chinese takeout sells the same exact thing so figure out what u want before you call, instead of wasting time.  Talk amongst your family members and figure out what everybody wants BEFORE you call.  It’s simple, not complicated, and very courteous. Ask what all your kids, nephews, nieces, siblings, parents, want BEFORE you call and include me in your family’s food conference.

You know what is the first thing I do when I order food over the phone? FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCK I WANT. It’s one thing if you have a question about some exotic complicated dish you never heard of before, but like I said, every Americanized takeout is the same. Americanized Chinese food is more American than apple pie. Its like me calling up a Burger King… you know you’re gonna end up with a fucking whopper so just decide if you want fries or onion rings.

The 2nd ANNOYING thing is asking for the total on a pickup/takeout order. I can understand if it was a delivery order and the delivery guy has limited change. I also understand in the case for delivery to get the correct total and tip ready for the driver to make a smooth transaction but damn this is pickup/takeout store,  do you seriously have no wiggle room for something between 10 and 20 dollars?

The 3rd most annoying thing has got to be customers that eat something, claim they don’t like it, and try to return it for a refund. OMFG, one time this customer ordered Shrimp with Broccoli, picked it up, took it home, and came back later saying he didn’t like it and demanded a refund. Yes it actually happens. Now keep in mind we don’t mind switching the dish to something else that’s more of your taste, but he came back with the dish half gone and all of the shrimp missing. Expanding on the Burger King example, you don’t eat half of your whopper and return it, so why should you do it here? This also isn’t a fucking TV you pick up from Best Buy,  CompUSA or etc and then return, this is food. And some of those places will even charge you a  restocking fee to counter the refunding.

You know what happens when I order something that I don’t like? There are three options, I either suck it up and finish it, give it to somebody else, or trash it.

To be Continued….

When “keeping it real” goes wrong – Chinese Rosa Parks version…

So I’m laying in my bed around 1:30am and my west coast friend sends me a link on Youtube that showed the verbal turned physical confrontation between a Chinese lady and a black lady on a bus somewhere in San Francisco. With the help of my Cantonese friend to translate what’s being said, one thing that’s clear is that the black lady was occupying two seats and would not allow the Chinese lady to sit in the vacant seat. Tempers flared and instead of trying to calm down an already frustrated woman, the black lady decides to instigate the situation by waving her hands wildly in a threatening motion and proceeded to, for a lack of better words, “keep it real”

As the situation escalates with each poorly pronounced profanity spewed by the Chinese woman, the black woman threatens “say it again” to which the Chinese woman obliged, possibly doing so without comprehending the words spoken by the other woman. As the black woman struck first she was met with full retaliation by the furious Chinese woman.

While I must admit that I am entertained by this video, it is also a little bittersweet. I am proud of the fact that the Chinese woman defended her right to a seat against that seat hog and also defending herself from an attack,  But I can’t help but feel this viral video is going to portray Chinese people in a negative light.

Some may consider the actions in this video to be savage and unnecessary and that it would be mature if one side had given in and let go. I agree with that. And if the black lady wasn’t ignorant and let the Chinese woman sit, there wouldn’t have been any problems. However, since that wasn’t happening I felt the actions chosen by the Chinese lady while savage were justified. If she was the stereotypically passive and submissive Asian woman and didn’t do anything, nobody would pay any attention, but since this video came around we can see this Chinese woman enlightening quite a few people in San Francisco and around the world.

Anyways, this video demonstrates some lessons to live by

1. Don’t start something that you can’t finish.

2. Have a sense when “keeping it real” may go wrong and stop.

3. Don’t be ignorant……………… and a fucking seat hog.

The ever growing list of shit customers of Chinese restaurants do to annoy me.

For those that don’t know me well in real life, my parents own a small Chinese take out restaurant. How stereotypical right? But hey it pays the bills and we get to eat all of the Americanized Chinese food we want.  To the matter at hand, it seems that everyday that I work in the restaurant there are brand new ways for some customers to annoy me. For the vast majority of customers that visit our little store, we welcome them with open arms and are glad that they chose us over the numerous competitors in the surrounding areas. I mean if there is one thing this city has, it’s a shitload of little pizza joints and Chinese take out restaurants.  However, for the other type of customers, we wouldn’t shed a tear if they decide to go to the other store down the block =), this post is a list of what some of latter customers do to get on my shit list.

-Annoying customers that call first not knowing what they want to order and then take their sweet ass time figuring that out while asking their 14 kids what they want to eat as well. We are glad to answer any questions about our dishes that you may have but seriously… try to get ur shit together before you order.

-Customer that always customized the crap out of their order. They customize it so much that its indistinguishable from the original order. This is not Burger King and no you may not have it your way. Time to start considering a pain in the ass surcharge.

-People that pays their 20-30 dollar order in change.     I wouldn’t complain if it was quarters, but pennies, nickels, and dimes? Here’s a tip, Coinstar Bitch.

-Customer’s who think they are entitled to free shit. Some restaurants that offer incentives for customers to order from their store may give a free 2 liter soda, free dish or something else when the customer orders more than a certain amount. We don’t do that because our store offers the greatest quantity and the best quality of food for a great price and quick service. This customer one time came in after buying about 20 dollars worth of food and wanted to add a bag of crispy noodles to her order, so I asked for 50 cents because its listed on the menu.  She then  says to me, “you’re going to charge me for that?”, to which I responded “Why not? Its listed on the menu for 50 cents” It would be the equivalent of walking into McDonald’s and ordering a lot of combo meals and asking them to throw in a side of nuggets. “you’re going to charge me for that?”

-Customers that ask where the place they are calling is right after you say the name of the place they just called. Example:

Employee: Hello, this is China Wok, Can I help you?

To which the customer replies with…

Customer: Is this China Wok?!!?!

Sometimes you just want to respond with, WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY???    ….. WHAT. THE. FUCK. DID I. jUST SAY?!?!   Normally this wouldn’t be a big deal, but when every 5th call you take is like that, it gets really repetitive and annoying. It seems like those customers dont listen until “they” start talking first.

To be Continued….